Great News!

I got some great news yesterday about my job.  But I should backtrack first and explain the situation and why it was such great news.

I have struggled in my life with worry and anxiety. In fact, when I was really young, every time we would drive home from a trip to SLC (which seemed like a long trip in my young mind) and we would turn the corner to where I could see our house, I was always relieved to see that the house had not burned down. Isn't that silly? But that was one of my biggest worries when I was a child and so I was always glad to see it hadn't happened.

That worry carried into my college years. I worried if I was taking the right classes or how a certain situation would turn out. In fact, I was reading my college journal recently and read about when I asked a guy out to Preference. I worried about it all that night and the next day I was still so worried that I could hardly think of anything else. It seems so needless to me now! Especially since now I see that no matter how he answered me, it really didn't matter in the eternal scheme of things. (As a side note, he said yes and we had a wonderful time, so all that worry was really needless...)

As I have grown older and especially as I have studied the Gospel over the years, I have learned that worry and anxiety is not part of Heavenly Father's plan for us. In fact, I have found in my life that worry, fear and anxiety weaken my faith and sometimes paralyze me from doing good things. So I have really fought against worry. When I start to worry, I try to remind myself that Heavenly Father is in charge, and that "things have a way of working out," (one of my favorite quotes by President Hinckley--he said it often.)

That is a long introduction to my good news, but I wanted to share it because I have been amazed at how it has worked in this situation and how Heavenly Father has helped me!

Last summer I found out that there were going to be some changes in education at the hospital. While I really supported and agreed with the philosophy of the changes, I wondered how it would affect my individual job?  I love my job at the hospital right now. I love working at both hospitals, I love teaching and training nurses and most of all, I love the flexibility my job gives me, especially with my calling at the temple and my busy family. We were supposed to find out within a month or two how it was going to affect us individually but it ended up being a longer process than they initially thought.

I had decided that I wasn't going to worry about this. If there is one thing I have learned from all my job changes the past few years, it is that Heavenly Father was always there, leading me to the next step and helping me know what to do. And so I didn't worry, not at all (which is quite a feat for me!!)

In November, we found out about some of the changes, but I still didn't know how it was going to specifically affect my job. They told us we would know for sure in January some time, so I really did have some more time to think and ponder about it. But from some things I had heard, I was pretty sure it was going to change more than I had initially thought. At that point it became a little more work not to be worried about how it would all work out.

One day in November I was doing a session at the temple. I was thinking about it at the beginning of the session and starting to worry, and then I remembered my resolve and decided that it would all work out, and I really didn't think about it much at all the rest of the session.

During the session, I saw a man from my Stake that I had gone on Trek with the year before. After the session he came over to talk to me. We talked for a minute and then he turned to leave. Suddenly, he turned back and said, "You looked like you had something on your mind during the session. I feel like I should tell you to hang in there, it will work out," then he walked away.

It was such a small thing and yet profound for me as I pondered about it. I hadn't really even thought about it except at the beginning of the session, so for him to say that really helped me. It was another reminder to me that Heavenly Father was aware of me and my situation and that it would all work out.

So, I have not worried about it. That said, it doesn't mean that I have not thought a lot about it, and I have definitely prayed a lot about it.

Well, after that long introduction, now to the GREAT NEWS. I got a call from my manager yesterday and she told me that I am going to be able to stay in the same job doing the exact same thing!! I still get to go to both hospitals (I really thought from some initial things I had heard that I may have to choose between the two and I really liked both of them.) I still get to work on orientation of new staff and I still have the exact same flexibility. The only thing that has changed is in the way I write my time in, which does not affect me at all.

I have thought a lot about this all night and this morning, which is why I am exploring this so in depth on my blog. I am so glad that I did not spend 6 months worrying about this just to find out that nothing changed. I am grateful for the experience in general and for what it has taught me about faith and trust and how things really do work out.

I know that even if I had been told that things were changing that it still would have worked out, but this experience has made me even more grateful for my job the way it is. I can't stop thanking Heavenly Father, not only that this situation has worked out well for me, but that He taught me a yet another lesson about faith and keeping faith even when things stretch out and take a lot longer than you think, a lesson I have been learning for years as I wait (and wait) to get married.

I hope all these morning ramblings make sense. It has just been such a great reminder to me of why it is needless to worry and how faith can help us to keep going, even when things are hard. Even though everything I worry about doesn't always work out so well, with Heavenly Father, it always works out. That is really what this experience has reminded me of and made me grateful for! I hope I can show faith in even harder circumstances and learn to trust Him even more!